So I am a major proponent of the “Golden Rule”. I absolutely live by it. It’s pretty much core to my moral compass. When I act, I always think how I would feel if someone did that to me. I won’t sit up here and say I’m an angel and I never do anything bad to people because that would be false. However, it’s a conscious decision I make. If/when I do something shady I think about how I would feel if someone did that to me, as well as how I’m going to feel when it comes back around because I believe in karma just as much as I believe in the golden rule.
Ok, so this whole mistress business… I don’t get it. Like, I don’t get it at all. I am so against the concept of being with someone when they’re with someone else. And this is just not pertaining to married men; this is with guys who have girlfriends as well. Silly thing is even though I’m so against it I am presented with the option to be the chick on the side somewhat often. I will say that most time the guys aren’t like, “yeah I got a chick but…” from jump. It’s usually like they start talking to me and somehow I find out and then they’re like, “yeah I got a chick but…”
You see, here’s the deal, being a mistress is beyond belittling to me. I mean in my opinion being the girl on the side is so small. It’s like someone saying you are nothing to them. And I know I may have the tendency to think a little highly of myself. I may think I’m a little better than I actually am. However, what I do know is that I am better and above being a mistress. I deserve and I expect to be the only girl. Please note that I did not say girl number 1 because I’m above that as well. When it comes to men I don’t believe in sharing.
But most importantly, if you really care about me you will see my worth. If we meet and the timing is off and you’re involved with someone else, you have a decision to make. You need to either find a way out of your situation or wait it out because if we’re meant to be it will eventually work itself out in the end. But if I mean so much to you that you need me in your life right then and there in spite of your current situation, you have underestimated my worth. I’m not as important to you as you say I am. Because if you really thought I was that special you would love me the way I deserve to be loved. You would want to give me all of you, not just the portion that’s “available” at this time.
With that being said, ladies please remember if a man wants you to be his chick on the side he doesn’t really love you. And if you so choose to be a mistress you may eventually become the “main girl” but just know someone has replaced your spot as mistress. And men please remember if you want a girl to be your chick on the side you don’t really love her. And if you so choose to have a chick on the side please know that one day you too will have to share.
I understand what you are saying completely. Way too many women settle for being the girl on the side, the second chick, or are a happy "main chick". Then, they have enough nerve to think that their side position somehow means the guy likes them more than he likes his real girlfriend...smh...I think that self esteem is at the root of the issue. People who don't value themselves personally are ok with being second or sharing. I can't really think of another reason why someone would want anything else.
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